Marriage and Cheating in the 21st Century
According to varied censuses conducted across the board, the rate of cheating has increased phenomenally over the years. We can attribute it to a number of factors, but before we get into that topic, let us look at how common is cheating in marriage from a female and male perspective.
The Libido Speaks
Men, in general, have wandering eyes, and given the fact that sex without the frills of a relationship is acceptable to many women, it makes life easier for the married man. Women, however, as a generality are not as obvious as men when it comes to straying from the marital bed. The ratio one would put it down to would amount to a 25% in men and probably 15% for the women, which is most likely to increase as the days go by, a scary statistic.
Sugar and Spice
Most couples work at a marriage when they find something is awry to strengthen the bond. Adding something new to pep things up in the bedroom changes the dynamic. However, this can also trigger a primal need to get it on with another mate, resulting in both seeking sex outside the confines of the marriage. Or one may just feel the need. One cannot with an assurance state that it is going to be the man first, but in all likelihood, it probably will be the male.
The Long Haul
Vows exchanged by couples when they get married is a bond that keeps them together in sickness and health, for better or worse. Unfortunately, not many prescribe to this when excitement becomes the be-all and end-all. One can call it the seven-year itch, but today it has become the seven-month itch. Cheating, however, cannot be pinpointed to a particular reason but temptation occurs when you are not even looking. Someone befriending you may lead to something else.
When a relationship is on tenterhooks something may be lacking like the spark that diminishes over time, as we get older. Women based on statistics have a lower sex drive. Some men too do not feel the need for some nookie with the spouse. Eventually, because of boredom, the chance of doing something naughty with someone else may take over. It could be in the form of a mere hookup or for someone who does not want penetrative sex, oral sex works.
No Lust at All
Unresolved issues between partners can be a cause for the relationship going sideways. Some unadulterated sex becomes a need that causes one or both to give in to their primal instincts. Sometimes one person may not be interested in sex at all, which can be an issue causing the other partner to seek gratification elsewhere. This could occur once or as often as possible.
Infidelity is not restricted to sex only, many people do not even go through the rigors of the act but prefer to connect with someone other than the spouse on an emotional level. That is also cheating. When both partners do not talk to each other or confide in each other, this can occur as a commonality. A lack of communication in the relationship may be reasons why one would seek emotional gratification elsewhere.
It is taken as a given that a relationship is always monogamous, but polyamory has become a relative constant. The format works for some people in long-term unions who would like to have fun with another partner. Polyamory is cheating if the spouse is not aware. Though not many are in favor of this, polyamorous couples feel that this is their happy ever after.
In a Nutshell
Cheating has many connotations to it – it could be emotional cheating (in the office, on the internet) and physical cheating (an affair, with a sex worker, a one-night stand). Infidelity is more common than one would imagine and is growing, some even consider this normal!