My Relationship Causes Me Stress - What to do?
So your relationship is causing you stress and you are worried this stress is going to sabotage your relationship. So what do you do? You worry some more and make things worse by stressing yourself out even more. Stress and anxiety are perceived as negative emotions, but they don't necessarily have to be. They could be trying to help you out by indicating an already existing problem in your relationship that you might need to address to overcome this anxiety. The most common source of relationship stress is relationship confusion. Let's look at how you can deal with relationship stress –
- Accept that there’s nothing wrong with feeling a little relationship stress – Relationship stress is common. If you're in a relationship with an introverted individual who doesn't communicate much, it is normal that you'll feel stressed out. When you love somebody, you want to have your channels of communication wide and open. Not having so can make your mind run wild in all directions anticipating the worst.
- Don’t worry about your relationship’s longevity – Why jinx a good thing needlessly? Enjoy your relationship while you’re in it and give your partner you're all in the present. Bask in your togetherness. If you must, talk about commitment. Find out how invested your partner is into the relationship and what, if anything, is holding him/her back from committing fully. Try to work these issues out together.
- If you’re stressing about your relationship, it means you care – Of course, you're stressing out about your relationship – you've found your love and you want to ensure it is safe. You don't want it to face risks you haven't already anticipated. So, you make yourself anxious thinking about what could make the relationship end.
- Let your partner know if his/her criticism is hurtful – Maybe you’re hearing a lot of negative remarks from your partner lately. Don’t keep mum and let things pass. Tell your partner when his/her remarks hurt you. Find out what the source of this negativity is and try to address it. If you don’t let your significant other know that their behavior is causing you discomfort, they’ll continue doing it. It will only make your relationship stress grow.
- Address the power balance – If the power equation in your relationship is skewered to provide an unfair advantage to one of you, redress it to make it equal. Both of you should have a space to convey your individual opinions in your relationship. No one person should have all the decision-making power.
- Think about your anxiety – Could there be real problems in your relationship that is making you anxious or are you simply overthinking things and being insecure? If it’s the latter, try to get a hold on yourself. Being excessively insecure can bring upon a relationship’s ruin.
- Retain your voice – Don’t compromise on your individuality to make the relationship tick. If your relationship requires you to give up on your own independent self, it probably isn’t worth it. Recognize this and move on.
- Deal with your ghosts – Every person carries the baggage of their past relationships into their present relationship. Try as we might, we cannot leave these be. They affect us and can impact our present relationship if your partner has set off a trigger unknowingly. Acquaint your partner with the issues you struggle with, so they know better than to press those buttons.
Relationship stress is normal, but sometimes, it can be cause for greater concern. Spend time finding out what is causing you to stress about your relationship and deal with it one by one.