Ahhh, the player… the sweet, sweet charmer that sweeps you up your feet before you notice there are plenty of other girls hovering around in his atmosphere. Unfortunately – it's too late. You're hooked, and he keeps getting more and more attractive in your eyes. So, what’s a girl to do? How can you handle a player and come out on top? These are the tips that will help you with these sticky situations.
1. Find out if he is really a player
First of all, make sure the person you are seeing is indeed a player. You can ask them point-blank if they are seeing other people and get a straight answer. After you do, decide if you want to be in a relationship with a person you have to share with others. If not, you can break things off with the player. If you decide to continue seeing them, you have to learn how to deal with a player in the best possible ways.
2. Adjust your expectations
A lot of people think that they are going to be that one special person who is going to make a player repent his ways and settle down with one person. Well, that only happens in 50 Shades of Grey type movies. In real life, players will play, and you can't make them stop. So, prepare for a non-exclusive relationship where the other person won't always be available to you.
3. Know when to put your foot down
Remember – you are the one who has the power to teach the other person how to behave. Is something the player does isn't OK with you, say so, especially at the beginning of your relationship. Set the tone for what is right with you and don’t be willing to put up with everything to make the other person hang around.
4. Don't take things too seriously
When learning how to handle a player, one of the most important things you should focus on is not to take them too seriously. When dating someone, most of us tend to read too much into every motion, every conversation, and every text. This can drive you crazy, especially when dealing with people who like to play 'dating games'. However, when dealing with a bona fide player, you have to take a few steps back.
This type of person will tell you upfront that they are not looking for something serious, so they have no reason to play regular dating games. So, if you decide to go out with someone and you find out that he is a player, try not to take things to seriously; instead, keep your attitude light and do not read too much into what they do or say. They have no ulterior motives, so you don't have to drive yourself crazy when handling a player.
5. Don't fall for everything he says
Players have the gift of gab, and they are notoriously charming and persuasive in how they speak. If you want to outplay a player, don't fall for everything he or she says to you. Actions speak louder than words, so make sure you notice what the player does and not only what he says.
6. Do what is right for you
Handling a player can be easy if you dismiss them right off the bat and not see them once you find out they like to play the field. However, if you decide to go out with someone while knowing they are seeing other people, make sure you listen to your instincts. You don't have to continue seeing them if you don't want to and you can spend your energy looking for someone who wants to be with you full time. You don't deserve any less.
7. Don't expect him to change
One of the main reasons women continue to go out with players in the hope that he will change; maybe he'll see something in you that he doesn't see in other women. Maybe your relationship with him is different and he will want to adjust himself and stop his games. Unfortunately, players will be players, and like with every other behavior pattern, the player will not change unless he decides he wants too.
So, you can hang around to see if he stops being a player for you or you can go your own way. If you feel like going out with a player is taking its toll on you, stop it. He will not change out of the blue and you will only stand to get hurt if you continue going out with a player. So, sometimes the answer to how to handle a player in a relationship is to let him go. If you can't keep your distance, if you feel jealous, if you make plans around him – it's not healthy for you. So, remember that you are number 1 on your priorities list and just let go.