How to Get Through and Ugly Divorce?
Divorces aren’t something that couples look forward to. Even if you may not be happy in your marriage, getting a divorce and having to go through the entire process can be emotionally, mentally, physically and financially taxing.
Especially if the divorce is fuelled by drama, it can be an ugly divorce. For example, if you are filing for divorce because your spouse was having an affair, or if your spouse doesn’t agree to the divorce, then in most cases, it will be an ugly divorce.
But just how ugly can divorce get? And what is some advice you can follow on how to survive an ugly divorce? To give you a better understanding, if your marriage doesn’t end well and your divorce process isn’t the smoothest, either you or your spouse may lose custody of your child/children, meaning you can never see them again; you may lose property and you may lose thousands of dollars and even have to pay unfair amounts in spousal support or child support, etc.
It’s best to keep things civil but that isn’t always possible. So, if you are faced with an ugly divorce, here are some tips to help you through the divorce process.
Don’t let emotions dictate your decisions and actions
The number one tip on how to survive an ugly divorce is to get a hold of your emotions. Getting divorced can be one of the most difficult experiences in your life, but it is also one that requires you to be able to think with a clear head as the proceedings will affect the rest of your life, and your kids too (if you have them).
Especially if your spouse is/was having an affair, or you got into a serious fight, or if the divorce isn’t mutual, it can be very easy to get emotional. You may be hurt, angry, and/or frustrated, but if you don’t control your emotions and learn to think with your head, you will have regrets later on. Trust your attorney and financial adviser when you can’t trust yourself.
Mediation is a court-mandated process that can help you and your spouse reach a fair and amicable settlement without having to go to court. Having a divorce trial can get pretty ugly, not to mention expensive, so mediation can be a life-saver for many people filing for divorce.
Mediation brings in a neutral third-party, who, as the name suggests, acts as a mediator between both spouses, helping them come to fair agreements on various divorce-related issues. Mediation is especially useful when financial matters have to be solved.
Try not to go to court for a trial
During a divorce process, time is money. The more time your divorce takes, the more money you are going to spend. Besides, a long divorce usually means an ugly divorce, so you want to finish the process and get on with your life as quickly as possible.
If possible, try not to go to court for a trial. These court battles can get vicious, not to mention expensive. They lengthen the divorce process too, forcing you and your spouse to go through more turmoil. If you can’t negotiate a fair settlement, consider mediation first.
Think about your kids
If you and your spouse have kids, remember that the divorce affects them too. As it is, having to experience the divorce of parents can be really difficult for children. So, don’t make it worse for them by having an ugly divorce.
With these tips on how to survive an ugly divorce, it is possible to have a fair and smooth divorce that works in favor of both parties.