Top Signs of an Unhappy Marriage
While marriage is theoretically supposed to be happy and a lifelong commitment, the reality is that not every marriage is successful. Sometimes people find themselves in situations where a partner is cheating, sometimes people get left behind after marrying their partners, sometimes people just outgrow each other. Realizing that marriage is either failing or has failed is a scary experience, but staying in an unhappy marriage can actually be detrimental to both partners.
But not every small fight or a bad day is an indicator that a marriage is failing. There are some tell-tale warning signs that come with an unhappy marriage. To better understand what those are, it's necessary to know what an
'unhappy marriage' really is.
What is an Unhappy Marriage?
When the relationship between two partners deteriorates to the level where either one or both partners feel unsatisfied in their relationship over a prolonged period of time, then it is considered an unhappy marriage. The signs that illustrate why you're unhappy in your marriage cover a breakdown of those parts of a relationship that help in the development of that bond in the first place.
It's entirely possible for a person to realize that they are in an unhappy marriage within weeks or months of their marriage. Unhappy marriages are also accompanied by negative feelings as well as a potential for decreased performance at work.
What are the Top Signs of an Unhappy Marriage?
If you find yourself in a marriage where you feel unloved, separated from the partner or having to deal with life's problems on your own, then chances are that you may be feeling unhappy in your relationship. There are some signs that indicate that the marriage is unhappy, and these are:
- A Decrease in Communication: Talking daily, or at least as often as possible, is one of the key requisites in most relationships. This doesn't change after marriage, and if the partner starts to talk with you less frequently, or you do the same, it could actually harm your marriage. A slowdown in communication may also show that either you or your partner is keeping secrets. This is another indication that the marriage is unhappy, as it is important to let your partner know what is happening in your life, in your relationship with them, as well as ask the same from them.
- Less Quality Time Together: If you haven't been on a date night in a long time, or if you and your partner can't even find the time to sit down and do something that you enjoy together, then that doesn't bode well for a happy marriage. While marriage is about building a life together, it is not possible to do that without focusing on the 'together' part of the marriage. When two people find themselves spending less time together, or not enjoying each other's company, then that indicates an unhappy marriage.
- Limited Intimacy: An important sign of an unhappy marriage is when either one or both partners do not want to be intimate with each other. Intimacy is a very important part of relationships, and a decrease in sexual activity in a marriage, or lack thereof, is a sure sign that you are in an unhappy marriage.
- A Lack of Laughter: A happy marriage is usually imagined as a family that is built of laughter, trust, and general happiness. While this is an extreme scenario and no one is always happy, the exact opposite, or a marriage that is close to it is not healthy either. If you feel as if you cannot smile or enjoy yourself with the person you are married to, or that they actually make you unhappy instead of happy, then that is a sure sign that something in the marriage is not working.
- Feeling Unloved: The biggest sign that a marriage isn't working comes from the feeling that either your partner does not love you, or that you do not love them. Marriage is a relationship based on romantic love, and when those feelings go away, it can create turbulence within the relationship. If you feel that your partner does not love you, or that you no longer love them, then both people will feel as if they are in an unhappy marriage.
Most unhappy marriages end in divorce. It is a healthier idea for both yourself, as well as your partner, to end a marriage that is not working. However, this is the most extreme course of action and people usually take this route when they know for sure that their marriages will not work for them.
Even if a marriage is unhappy, if both partners are committed to making the marriage work, then the situation can be flipped around to a successful marriage. Anything from marriage counseling to deliberately finding ways to make each other happy can work towards resolving marriage issues. Communication plays the most important role in this. If both partners do not intend to see the marriage through, or if they feel that the differences in the marriage are irreconcilable, then a divorce is the ideal route, as otherwise an unhappy marriage can deplete your health, wealth and long term well being.