What are Emotional Abandonment Issues Signs You Need to Know?
People do not always know about their inherent fears. There are some fears that they possess even without realizing that they do. The fear of abandonment is one such fear. Neglect could take place in a relationship either when there is a breakup or when there is sudden death. People with the fear of losing someone or the fear of being abandoned are said to have abandonment issues.
This is when the person is in a constant state of agony, expecting the worst to happen even before it does. This is a very common condition, and you can easily tackle it if you acknowledge your fear.
So how do you know whether you have abandonment issues?
If you would like to know whether you have abandonment issues check whether you display any of the following symptoms-
You continuously try to make everyone happy
Being a people pleaser can take a toll on your mental health. If you find yourself to be constantly trying to please your partner, then there are chances that you have abandonment issues. This is when you are afraid to tell ‘no’. So you constantly heed to your partner’s words.
You do not want to stay alone or stay single
If you have abandonment issues you might find yourself getting into relationships too quickly. You start taking things to the next level too soon, due to the fear of losing the person otherwise. And those who are in an unhealthy relationship are too afraid to come out of it due to the fear of being single.
You build walls around yourself
When you have had bad relationships in the past, you unintentionally start building walls around yourself. You might either be too cold or you might not be ready to get emotionally involved in a relationship. This is when you are afraid to open up your heart due to the fear of being heartbroken again.
You find your self-esteem crumbling
You feel responsible for everything that goes wrong in a relationship. If your partner doesn’t treat you well, or if you are having a troubled relationship then you start blaming yourself. You start thinking that you do not deserve love.
You suddenly find yourself feeling jealous
You might not have been an overly jealous person in the past. But after a few broken relationships if you start noticing a feeling of jealousy then it could be a sign of abandonment issue. If you are single, you might feel jealous of other people who are in a healthy relationship. And if you are in a relationship, this jealousy creates a constant feeling of insecurity.
You yearn for a flawless relationship
You look for a perfectionist to be a part of your life. Strong relationships are all about acknowledging and accepting imperfections in each other. But if you have abandonment issues you start focusing more on the flaws. When you lose a partner or a relationship you start looking for someone perfect. This is on the involuntary assumption that someone who is perfect would give you a perfect relationship that doesn’t quiver.
You always try to be in control
If you have abandonment issues you might want to feel like the person in control. A strong relationship should be mutual with no one should try to be in the saddle. You feel that by exercising control you would be able to ensure that things go right in your relationship. But when you really love someone, you should learn to let go. A little freedom goes a long way in strengthening a relationship.
If you were able to relate to one or more traits in the above list, there is a high likelihood that you have abandonment issues. It is time to acknowledge it and overcome this fear.