Trial Separation Checklist: This Is What You Need to Do in Trail Separation
A trial separation is a path that many couples are venturing into in this modern world. People take this step only when they feel they have exhausted all other options, but they are still not sure if they want a divorce.
What is Trial Separation?
In the hit sitcom Friends, people remember that Rachel and Ross were on a break. Ross thought that meant that they ere have broken up and to Rachel, it was just some time out from a suffocating relationship. In the same manner, different people perceive trial separation as different things. To some people, it is the final step before ending a relationship and to others, it is time off to better understand the problem and each other.
A trial separation is honestly a complicated situation. It is often difficult to understand where everyone stands exactly. To shed some light on the situation this article will discuss a few trial separation checklist that couples should follow:
Get your Money Sorted
Odds are that if you have been married for a few years then all your finances and accounts are mixed up. Separate your finances and keep a log of your individual expenditure at the time of trial separation. If as a wife you want some amount of maintenance, decide upon the exact amount, and ask your husband to debit it to your personal account on a monthly or weekly basis. If you have kids then it is even more important to sort the finances out at the beginning.
Prioritize the Children
If as a couple you share custody of children prioritizes their lives first. That does not mean do not live separately for the sake of your children. Sit down together with them and make them understand that you both will live separately for some time, Distribute your duties and time with your children among each other. Make a constructive plan so there is no confusion or ill-feeling. Set some ground rules, this will also be helpful for the kids.
Use the Time Apart
Most likely you have decided to do trial separation because you cannot stand to be close to each other at this time. You must have a lot of pent yo emotion and resentment. Use the time out away from each other. When you are married to a person for many years, you get used to each other. Your partner almost becomes a habit for you. It can be difficult to break free from the routine, and you will miss each other. But still, try to focus on yourself as an individual and try to understand yourself and your feelings better.
If you are a mother who gave up her job after the kids came along or if you have some extra time in your hands. Use that to employ yourself in something that you are passionate about. Find some purpose in your life and work towards it. Working is the first step to self-realization and self-reliance. Make a lot of lists and note down things that you need to get or achieve, set a timeline for yourself. You can also keep a journal to write down your feelings. When you write down your emotions it helps to sort them out.
First, take care of yourself. Pamper yourself and go out a lot with friends and family members. At the same time stay in, relax and don’t do anything that might get you stressed. Once you have done that take baby steps towards forming a friendship with your husband. Suggest weekly family nights or meet with friends.