Tips for Sharing a Home While Divorcing
Divorce is a phase which tests a lot of your abilities, patience being the major one. The test becomes even more difficult when you don’t get along with your partner and yet you have to live in the same home during the process of divorcing. It is obviously advisable to stay at separate places but sometimes, you just don’t have a choice. But here are some tips that will help you in sharing a home, even while you are in the process of divorcing your partner.
Give Each Other Space
You should remember that you are going through the divorce because you didn’t get along in the first place and so you should give each other space. Designate areas in the house that will belong to you separately so that one person will not interfere with the other’s affairs. So, in this manner, you will not be intruding the other person’s life and get through the divorce peacefully.
Proper Allocation of Parenting Duties is Important
For couples who have children, divorce can get messy if not handled properly. So, you need to allocate your parenting duties properly while you are still living in the same house. You should pick days in every week that will belong to each parent separately. This way, you can spend time with your children the way you want to without your spouse interfering. Decide who will be responsible for the kid’s homework and who will pick him/her up from school.
Work Out the Expenses and Budget
When it comes to expenses, you should never hide anything and be open about it all in front of your spouse. Sit and discuss the various needs of the family and all the legal expenses as well. Then decide how much you are ready to spend on the monthly grocery, mortgage or rent, or other bills. Keep all the receipts at one place and then reconcile them when the month ends.
In this era of digital media, everyone is likely to send a text rather than talking face-to-face. But when your divorce is still processing and you are living in the same house, why not talk verbally? This will also reduce much of the miscommunication. In a text, you can never figure out the tone of the message but when you talk to the person directly, you know what he/she really means. So, there are no thinly-veiled threats or insults. Be firm yet friendly and don’t indulge in petty fights.
Take Care of Yourself
In all these strenuous legal processes, there might be a lot of stress. But you should not forget to take care of yourself. If you feel off, then take a break and go for a manicure or in a movie with your friends. Schedule regular gym or yoga sessions. This will also make you used to the life after divorce so that you can cope with the changes.
Talk with the Children
When you are going through a divorce and yet living in the same house, don’t think that your children not going to notice. They are clever and they will know that something is wrong, so you should never hide anything from them. If they are not of age, just let them know that Mommy and Daddy are facing some issues in staying together. If you are not yet ready to put it out there, just make your kids understand that you might be separating from your spouse.
These are only some of the things that you can do in order to live with your spouse in the same home during a divorce. It can be a difficult time especially because you are transitioning into a new life but it will get better with time.